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神学翻译|翻译语序的调整实例

阅读本文大约需要: 3 分钟

心绪不宁。继续翻译F.F.Bruce的《使徒行传》注释。工作效率低下。根据日志记录,每次连续工作的时间不超过10分钟,多半会被某个兴高采烈的孩子跑来打断:

"Daddy,can I print out a coloring page?" 
"Sure, why not!" 
"Can I sit on your lap?" 
"Yes, please." ……

有几个句子,都是关于后置定语从句的翻译。常见译者在这样的地方略显迟疑,或者不知所措,所以聊作记录,供日后参考。

Not every member of the church of Jerusalem would be prepared to have a party of Gentile Christians in his home; but they might be sure of a hospitable reception from Mnason, one of the small minority of Hellenists still remaining in the mother-church.

这个句子若翻译为“并非每个耶路撒冷教会成员都愿意在家接待一群外邦基督徒;但是他们或许肯定能从拿孙那里得到接待;拿孙是母教会里留下的少数说希腊话的成员之一”,显得较为笨拙。遇到这种情况,我会想法把定语从句拿到前面,先对拿孙的身份加以说明:

并非每个耶路撒冷教会成员都愿意在家里接待一群外邦基督徒;但是他们知道,拿孙是仍旧留在母教会中不多的几位说希腊话的基督徒,定会热情招待保罗一行。

这样处理起来,句子更加通顺,而不用在思路上中断一下,方便接续下一句话的叙事。另一个例子是:

Luke does not explain why Paul regarded his visit to Jerusalem as so solemnly imperative; his determination can be better understood in the light of Rom. 15:25–32, where Paul sets forth the importance of his going there with the evidence of ministry among the Gentiles thus far.

按照原文的顺序,被动语态,定语后置:

路加没有解释为何保罗会将自己前往耶路撒冷一事视为一件如此庄严的命令;保罗的决定可以参考罗 15:25-32,更好地加以理解。在罗马书15:25-32中,他说明了亲自向耶路撒冷教会报告自己迄今为止在外邦人中间服事大有果效的证据,对他而言相当重要。

修改为主动语态,前置定语:

路加没有解释为何保罗会将自己前往耶路撒冷一事视为一件如此庄严的命令;保罗在罗 15:25-32中曾经表露,亲自向耶路撒冷教会说明自己迄今为止在外邦人中间服事大有果效的证据,对他而言相当重要,借此或许可以让我们更好地理解他此刻的决心。


下面这句没有调整,我觉得还行。

It has been surmised that even at the time with which we are dealing information such as Philip and his daughters could supply was highly prized by Luke, who made use of it in the composition of his twofold history—not only during the few days which he spent at Caesarea now, but also during the two years of Paul’s imprisonment there (cf. 24:27).

有人猜测,甚至在当时路加也相当重视腓力和他女儿们所提供的信息,并用作撰写自己两卷本历史的素材。这些宝贵素材不仅来自于他在凯撒利亚停留这短短几天,而且还有保罗在此坐牢两年期间的从腓力一家所获得的见闻(参24:27)。


希望在疫情结束之前,就把这本书翻译完。现在算是第一优先级的任务。隔离中无聊,姑且记之。

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